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Wednesday, 4 November 2015

a glossary of terms


Ladies and gentlemen

We have needed this for ages

Fuck knows what Textusa is on about most of the time. To help newcomers, please leave any acronyms you encounter in the comments for this post, and they will be added to the glossary.

Many thanks.

NT




BRT - Big Round Table

A piece of furniture which, by circumventing several laws of physics, was capable of seating nine adults in relative comfort.

The last BRT is believe to have died out around the time of the Crusades; no pictures exist, and they are widely regarded as being mythical

Murat-Grapes

A debilitating and intractable form of haemorrhoid, which only occurs in those with dual English and Portuguese nationality

Government BH

Government Black Hats - people who for no reason on gods earth decided to cover up the death of a child.

Clutter 

Anything palpably true, with which Textusa disagrees

VHLCU 

Fuck knows

Stinkbombs

A bit like clutter - true things contributed by posters which forces Textusa into full reverse

Summerbreak 

A period many look forward to for relief from Textusa's witterings, only to be bitterly disappointed more often than not when she simply refuses to go. 

JMSE
Jenny Murat Stall Effect - 
Oh seriously, I'll have to read it again, it was utterly bizarre 

Negligence Pirouette
A way of getting up from a table which indicates that you are an evil instrument of the devil, hell bent on making a teeny tiny table look like a BRT.




3 comments:

  1. Inadequateness of esplanade - still one of my favourites, I use. It from time to timeto impress friends and family..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Corker, isn't it?

      That and ''Denounced by her shopping bag'' are definitely my favourites, although ''Negligence pirouette'' is right up there too.

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete

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